I have this oddly guilty feeling nowadays when I don't feel vulnerable. Days like today, when I feel like I'm crushing it, make me feel somewhat invincible which is far from vulnerable. When I set these kinds of days alongside the days when I'm panicking, or feeling self-doubt, or struggling with my identity, they seem fewer than they used to be.
I fully recognize that I'm in transition now which has created much of the uncertainty. I'm spending more of my time speaking and preparing for speaking engagements, and selling vulnerability walls, and creating event experiences. That's new for me in this iteration. And it's working. Exciting offers are coming in. That feels so awesome to share with you. It. Is. Working.
This has been a dream of mine for a while now and to watch it come to life is a little unbelievable to me. Take the Vulnerability Wall for instance. We had to invest in that way of showing up in the world for a solid 14 months before offers started rolling in that are now monetizing that project.
The Vulnerability is Sexy game has been a slog to push through on kickstarter and thanks to a generous donor who wants a big reward, we expect to meet our goal; but it didn't come easily.
And my speaking... I've had to speak for free for 14 months before I'm now being offered some legitimate speaking fees that value my contribution as a facilitator.
It was 14 months of a roller coaster and now suddenly, we are in a new flow. It feels like a sweet loop is coming and we are in that momentum building part of the ride, accelerating downward before we soar up into the sky.
So today I am grateful. Grateful that the idea + a lot of hard work and determination are being validated. Grateful that the vision I saw is now being seen by others. Grateful that I'm still hungry and working hard to show up and knock people's socks off. Sometimes I can become easily bored, and I'm far from it right now. I'm in the challenge. And that feels so wonderfully alive.